My Surreal Life

My Musings, My Thoughts & My Ponderings

Parents & New Relationships

What is the appropriate response to your parents reluctance to accept your new relationship?

My mother appears to continue to have an issue with the fact that there are children present in my relationship.  I can understand the point that she didn’t expect that this was what was going be part of my future and that I would create my own family but she has yet to actually met the children and come around to the concept of me being around and parenting someone elses kids.

It hurts a lot because she has shown me how to be this wonderful, loving person who can adapt in this sort of situation and respect the children and guide them in the great way she has helped me but instead I just get this uneasy and hurt sort of response from her all the time.

We asked her out for the communion party on Saturday but she said she wasn’t ready yet.  I don’t understand how that can be the case. I didn’t get over 12 months to get used to the idea of parenting, i had even less time than pregnant people.  I had roughly 6 weeks.  I jumped in head first and have enjoyed every minute of my experience.

My mother and I have always had a great relationship and we have always been able to talk about everything together but my current relationship and my current parenting is really uneasy for her.  I’d like to be able to ask her parenting questions but for some reason I feel like she isn’t listening to me when I’m speaking about it because I get one word responses.  It hurts me a lot because that’s not the person she allowed me to grow up to be but it seems to be okay for her.

I can sense the undertone of her voice being a very ‘they are not your kids, you shouldn’t be parenting them, its wrong’, kind of thing, and that definitely hurts.  Should I not be parenting the kids to the best of my ability and ensuring that they are getting love from all angles.  Particularly, when I have a very good relationship with them.  Better than I thought I would have with them so early. But that is a testament of Mr. Rockstar’s parenting skills.

I’m hurt by my mothers behavior, I really don’t think its necessary and it is driving a little gap between us…  Because when I get married really soon, she is going to have some issues especially if I elope.  Which to be fair isn’t to annoy her, its for me and my man.  She is definitely adding a stress I don’t want at all.


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This entry was posted on May 24, 2011 by in Reposted Blogs.

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